The boys are napping, the snow outside is swirling, and the house is cozy and warm...so very warm. And I can't stop thinking about you.
Darling Sleep, I miss you so.
Ours is a tragic yet common tale. We used to be so happy. For years and years I met you easily each night, taking you for granted, never doubting I'd have your company for eight, nine hours in a row. I'll never forget that snowy night, December 6th, 2007, at 3:06am, to be precise, when you walked out on me without so much as a goodbye nap. The weeks rushed by in a delirious blur and I was sure I'd never lay my dark and puffy eyes on you again, but about three months later you crawled cautiously back into my bed. Oh, how I cherished you then! I swore we'd be together forever. But you are a cruel and fickle lover, Sleep, and I soon learned that our rendezvous' would be little more than teasingly short-lived. You'd show up at my bedside two nights in a row but disappear without explanation for the next three. You'd arrive on time with promises of the dreamy evening before us, only to slink out of the house at 2:00am mumbling something about vaccinations or too much sugar. By August of 2008 I was so desperate for your company that I read books about obtaining you and talked to other scorned women in hopes of winning you back. I made a plan. I fought for you. That August, more than eight months after your initial betrayal, you seemed to be back for good. The "cry it out" method seemed to be our only hope for a life together. Of course things weren't entirely that same; the Big Boy Bed debacle of December of 2009 nearly shattered my hopes of a permanent commitment between us. But we worked through it. We did. And I clung to my foolish dreams of resting forever in your pillow-topped arms until... until... the arrival of James in February of 2010.
Throughout the past ten months James has conspired to keep us apart with surprising ferocity. His pure hatred for you is matched only by his undying love for me and my constant companionship and has all but assured we will never, never, be together again. I see that now. I suppose I must accept it. I might never forgive James for keeping us apart, but I will accept it. So, it is with crazed and desperate sadness that I wave the white flag and say, simply, goodbye.
Sleep, we had something beautiful. Never forget me.
Longingly yours,
Courtney
4 comments:
lol...I was laughing all the way through this. So true...
Oh Courtney--you crack me up. I hate to say that I loved this, because that is like me saying I love that you are getting no sleep, but you gave it such a humorous spin. You should submit this to a parenting magazine or something!!
Nit, May I say you are getting your "Just Desserts"...I, too, lost my relationship with sleep from Dec. 18th 1979 (when you were born) to Dec. 18th 1884 when you and your brother got bunk beds and finally started sleeping through the night(mostly). In fact, lack of sleep is probably the reason you didn't have more siblings.
Could Jimmy be cuter? Could Charlie be smarter? This Baba thinks they are are worth loosing sleep over just as you and your brother were years ago.
Well said, my friend, well said. Sleep will again find you.... someday.
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