Ten years!

Ten years ago today Billy and I had our first date while studying abroad in England. While this post (circa 2006) is a little cheesy, nostalgia got the best of me...

Written in November, 2006, while Billy was researching in England:

"In a few hours I'll board the plane that will bring me to Billy. It's been over two months since he left. I'm overwhelmed with happiness and anticipation, but tonight I'm also overwhelmed with nostalgia; for me England will always symbolize the introduction of Billy into my life.

The first time I saw Billy, I couldn't stop looking at his face. I don't believe in fate or soul mates or love at first sight, but I do recognize there are things we can't explain. And I can't explain why I found his face so appealing. It wasn't just that I thought he was handsome, it was something else. I found his face comforting and interesting and familiar.

The night I arrived in Cambridge, I was worn down and uncertain and simply exhausted. I had spent the whole day traveling from Vienna to Zagreb to London to Cambridge and finally arriving at my chilly little flat late at night. I remember washing my face, wrapping myself in the same yellow robe I'm wearing right now, and getting ready to collapse in my unfamiliar bed. But when a somewhat tipsy Billy appeared in my doorway with a very tipsy Deisha (my new roommate), I ignored my tired body's protests and sat up half the night talking to him. In my first night in this foreign country, I can't describe the comfort and warmth I felt in his company.

The next few weeks were a blur of welcome parties and orientations. Six years later, all I can remember of the dinners, formal halls, cocktail hours, and seminars was way I found Billy in every crowd, and the way I felt when I realized he was searching for me in the crowds as well.

I remember a weekend in February when we closed ourselves off from the dreary city, spending whole days laughing and telling secrets in Billy's twin-sized bed, me drawing pictures of faces and girls on Billy's notebooks and Billy drawing ships and war scenes next to them. I remember realizing we hadn't eaten for too long, and how triumphant Billy was when he returned from the vending machine, diving into the warm tangle of blankets and letting me choose between the cheezits and peanut butter crackers.

I remember hurrying through the heavy winter air toward the cafeteria in the morning, seeing Billy's eyes crinkle warmly when they spotted me, and suddenly feeling very beautiful in my red jacket and jeans.

Almost six years later, I'm returning to England and returning to Billy. My feelings for him are more certain, more calm, and deeper. But the memories of our first meeting there are ones I cherish above all else."